It's largely a meaningless science, particularly when you cannot rely on the information you read on food labels (not counting the 20% variance from claims allowed by law):

http://www.canada.com/health/news/6493401/story.html

Well, shit.

This kind of scares me. I already don't know how to eat properly, and now I can't trust the labels? Gah. It's so frustrating.

Aw, Emma, it's not about the numbers. It's about eating a variety of foods for health and enjoyment. None of these numbers that we have transformed almost into a religion mean anything. Weight: five scales - five different numbers. BMI: meant to be used to assess groups, not individual's health, and even still, guidelines about "healthy" BMIs are changing to raise both the lower and upper limits. Calories: are calculated by a methodology that is based entirely on lab experiments. More on calories: this apple is bigger than that one. Percentage of fat: how's this for a mindfuck: I found a Greek yogurt this morning that is only 5 calories higher for the 2% fruit flavoured (with real sugar) than the 0% fat fruit flavoured (more sugar) for exactly the same quantity (I bought both, but only because the cherry one only comes in non-fat and I love cherries more than any other fruit). Bodyfat: this is a great one; get 5 different people using the same calipers and get 5 results. Get one person using 5 different calipers, and get 5 results.

We count and we count and we count, and really, what do we need to do? Eat balanced meals and snacks and enjoy our food, including treats. What's balanced? Ask in IOP, or even go see a dietician now, before you get admitted.

I emailed my dietitian and asked him about difficulties I have been having with structured eating and my anxiety about it and my constant second guessing of caloric intake, portion sizes etc. He responded with the following "If you continually second guess/over analyse the 'plan' (reg. meals & snacks), this emotional tug of war will continue as long as you want to play the game. Like I've said previously, the advantage of having the meals & snacks planned out is that you really don't have to analyse them - we know your energy, protein, vitamin & mineral requirements will be met."

He's right, I need to just eat and by doing so, most my other concerns will take care of themselves. I just have to do my best to ignore my anxiety and stick to my eating plan. Doing so is the only thing that will keep me healthy. I have to keep reminding myself that the ed pretends that it comes out of a pretense of health but really the motivation is one of self destruction, self punishment and attempts to neutralise the anxiety that the ED thoughts bring me.

^^^Yes!!!

Exactly! You go, girl!

This kind of freaks me out.

Why's that? I'm kind of curious.