WBB ESSAYS
Proud of My Body
- amster_71
While I used to spend hours in front of mirrors giving acidic critiques of my body right down to believing that my blood vessels were too wide, I now find that I'm just not all that interested in my appearance.
I like to look nice - experiment with fixing my hair in different ways, fiddle around with make-up techniques, do the home tooth whitening, etc. What I don't do is focus on body shape and size very much. And when I am looking at my body, I do it in a positive way. I'm proud of the silver stretch marks on my abdomen- they are marks that remind me that my body was able to carry both of my children throughout their prenatal development ~ quite a miracle in itself. My breasts, while they're saggy, are that way because they provided nourishment for my sons for the first year of their lives. Again, an amazing thing that a body can do, especially given the abuse that my own body experienced. I have the same nose as my grandmother, who was an incredible woman. My feet are cute. My tummy has a bit of a rounding to it. That's a sign of health, of recovery, a lack of restriction.
I have curves which is how a woman is supposed to look instead of straight up and down like a pre-adolescent boy. My face is no longer gaunt and I have a natural glow of color that doesn't have to be carefully painted on with make-up to hide ill health. I'm happy that I have brown eyes that have pretty good vision.
Sure, there are a few really minor things that I would like to change, but they don't really matter. I'd like for my fingernails to be stronger so they would grow out more but that doesn't change how I feel about myself.
I feel good about myself because I know what's in my heart. I know that I'm a very good-hearted, moral, ethical person. I know that even though I don't have much money, I still find ways to give to those who are less fortunate than me. I know what non-material things I have to offer and I give freely. I value that through recovery I've become a great mom, which has always been extremely important to me. And I have a respect for myself that nobody can take away. I'm a strong, wonderful, beautiful woman and none of it is based on appearance because that just isn't important to me any longer.
I've found that inner beauty truly is more important.
- amster_71
